Why You’re Losing Money by Not Loving Yourself

Hands holding money

We have all heard that self-love and self-compassion are important. Maybe you have even read our blog post on how to incorporate self-love into your everyday life. But has anyone ever told you that by not giving yourself enough love, you’re not only hurting your happiness but your bank account, too?

New research shows that people are actually losing money by being self-critical and overly judgmental of their own choices. The main reason for this is that confidence and self-worth are being repeatedly tied to professional success.

In one article written by Forbes, a contributor wrote,

“Self-worth is not a measure of your external value. It’s the subjective, internal measure that you place on yourself. Confident people didn’t become confident because they landed a stellar, high-paying job; to the contrary, they landed the job because they perceive themselves in a positive light and they exude confidence. Don’t believe me? Take a look at this study, which found that confidence during teenage years strongly correlates with higher earnings in adulthood.”

If you take a look at the study, it’s true: there appears to be a positive association between self-esteem and earnings. Now, we’re not saying you’ll become a billionaire by telling yourself you’re awesome when you’re brushing your teeth every morning. Self-esteem, however, can certainly be a stepping stone to success in many more facets than just the emotional or mental.

So, how can you start becoming more self-confident? We’ve compiled five tips for you.

1. Visualize your ideal self.

Visualization is an incredibly powerful tool. New research even suggests that imagining yourself working out can improve your muscle mass! If you take the time every night or every morning to visualize how you want to be in three weeks, three months, or even a year, it will be easier for you to prioritize the steps you’ll need to take to get there. The more you visualize, the more realistic that possibility becomes, and the more willing you will be to work for it.

2. Question your inner critic.

We talk about this in our article on self-love, but in order to cultivate self-confidence, you have to practice droning out your inner critic. Your self-critical talk is a survival instinct meant to keep you “safe,” and it will do so at all costs, such as worrying about the impractical or fearing the irrational. We can never listen to our inner critic if we are trying to grow self-confidence because its job is precisely to make us unconfident and, as a result, scared to take the risks to improve ourselves.

3. Help someone else.

People who volunteer and donate their time to helping those in need of assistance consistently report higher levels of self-esteem and overall well-being. Helping others will help you too. Simply incorporating gratitude into your life or spending a bit of time or money on noble causes that align with your values can lift you up and motivate you in the other parts of your life. Here is our guide on random acts of kindness to help you start.

4. Prepare yourself for success.

If you proactively spend your time preparing yourself for success, you will be forced into feeling more confident. In short, it’s hard to be confident in yourself if you don’t think you’ll do well at something.

For example, if you are preparing for a presentation or trying to get out of bed and feel comfortable in your own skin, you repeat your self-love mantras while running over your notes or putting on the clothing that makes you feel good about yourself.

5. Set small goals and achieve them.

To build self-trust and confidence, it is important to prove to yourself that you can be counted on. In order to do this, set small goals for yourself every day and aim to complete them. It’s okay if you’re not running a marathon or learning to cook a 10-course meal in one afternoon. Rome wasn’t built in a day.

We hope these tips will help you gain self-confidence, and as research shows, subsequently gain a higher salary as well. We’d love to hear your thoughts, so don’t hesitate to share them below! Do you find yourself performing better at work when you feel confident? What makes you the most confident?


By Ava Ford

Ava Ford is a writer, thinker and mental health advocate.